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Round up the usual suspects
May. 12th, 2006 07:42 pmThe scene of the crime:
Upstairs bathroom. Big bathtub 3/4 full of water, in which are sunk several magazines that, as of this morning, had been residing on the wide bathtub ledge. Water is dribbling, no, softly streaming from the bathtub faucet. One of the magazines has blocked the drain, ergo the filling tub.
The suspects:
--Boy. Denies the crime. Has an alibi ("I was watching TV"). Had opportunity, but no priors and no apparent motive.
--Large white dog. Admits every crime he's asked about, but it's usually just a generally guilty conscience. Has alibi ("me? voluntarily get near the bathtub? have you lost your mind, Mom?"). Had opportunity, but no priors and no apparent motive.
--Small white dog. No alibi. Had opportunity. No priors, but has a history of sitting by the bathtub while I bathe, observing my actions with exquisite attention, and drinking my bathwater. Also has history of chewing on magazines when my reading of such in bathtub interfere with the flexibility and reach of my petting arm. This may be motive.
Notes for the file: Conspiracy a possibility that shouldn't be overlooked. If it is, though, the little guy is definitely the brains of the operation.
Upstairs bathroom. Big bathtub 3/4 full of water, in which are sunk several magazines that, as of this morning, had been residing on the wide bathtub ledge. Water is dribbling, no, softly streaming from the bathtub faucet. One of the magazines has blocked the drain, ergo the filling tub.
The suspects:
--Boy. Denies the crime. Has an alibi ("I was watching TV"). Had opportunity, but no priors and no apparent motive.
--Large white dog. Admits every crime he's asked about, but it's usually just a generally guilty conscience. Has alibi ("me? voluntarily get near the bathtub? have you lost your mind, Mom?"). Had opportunity, but no priors and no apparent motive.
--Small white dog. No alibi. Had opportunity. No priors, but has a history of sitting by the bathtub while I bathe, observing my actions with exquisite attention, and drinking my bathwater. Also has history of chewing on magazines when my reading of such in bathtub interfere with the flexibility and reach of my petting arm. This may be motive.
Notes for the file: Conspiracy a possibility that shouldn't be overlooked. If it is, though, the little guy is definitely the brains of the operation.
