(no subject)

Fie upon thee, o vile Chili Cheese Fritos! Thou art the very soul of temptation, promising the fiery warmth of the Caribbean isles coupled with the healthy nourishment of a good cheddar. Thou lure (lurest?) the weak with thy saucy gold and red wrappings. And what utter hell befallest the unwary! Not just dyspepsia and a strange aftertaste, but the abhorrent (and belated) discovery that yon little 4 oz. sack of sin purportedly contains four servings, for a total of over 700 calories, 60% of one's "recommended daily value" of fat, and 44% of the daily value of sodium.

Ah, if only one could turn back time, if only this sinner could return to that time of lost innocence, if only I'd stuck to my original plan to snack on carrots today... _{*urp* *scuse me*...if only I had some Tums....}